Who to Invite to Wedding? Wedding Guest List Helps!


As soon as you get engaged, the very next step is to plan the wedding. A wedding venue and budget cannot be determined without divvying up the guest list. Who to invite to wedding? This is a question that gives you nightmares coz you don’t want anyone to get annoyed and feel left out. But the budget constraints do not allow you to invite each and every family member including the “plus ones”. Trimming down your guest list is the only option to get out of this trouble. Here is a complete guideline to get you out of the wedding list dilemma.

Wedding Invitees Etiquettes

Let’s see who should be invited to the wedding ceremony.

Enlisting the Priorities

Before stabbing a final guest list, divide all your guests except immediate family members, into four sub lists.

  • List “A” should include all your closest friends, college friends and buddies that you love to spend your time with and can’t imagine your wedding day without them.

  • List “B” should bear the names of the relatives including uncles, aunts, cousins or those high school friends that are always in touch with you.

  • List “C” should be consisted on the names of colleagues, close neighbors and your parents’ friends.

  • List “D” should have the names of the distant relatives or cousins, friends who are not in constant touch with you and your parents’ acquaintances.

Now starts the time of cutting down the guest list starting from list “D” to upwards.


Fix It with Parents

Parents from both sides have their own lists of invitees. But sometimes when the “couple to be” pays for the whole ceremony, they don’t ask parents for their guests list. To avoid any fuss, go for the traditional way.

Divide the guests in three equitable parts: one third guests from bride’s parents, one third from groom’s parents’ side and the other third will be the combined guests of the couple. Following this traditional method will skillfully lessen the risks of any possible “tug of war”.

Important note: If all the wedding expenditures are being made from one side only (that mostly happens) then you should look for a just way out by divvying up the guests impartially.


Etiquettes for Coworkers

The most significant aspect in finalizing about who to invite to wedding from your office is the “size of the workplace”. If you work in a small company with a few coworkers, you should invite them all along with their wives (if there is any). Working in an expanded company with lots of colleagues gives you the option of skillfully skipping some and choosing the ones that are not only closer to you but will also be socializing with you, once you leave the job. Many consider inviting the boss too. You can invite him if you are on fair terms and feel comfortable in his company.


When You Need to Say No to Kids

To lessen the budget constraints, trimming down kids from your guests list is a cool idea. The best way is not to mention kids names on the envelop or just write the names in order “for Mr.& Mrs.” On the invite. If you think it can possibly ruffle the parent’s feathers, you can ask your near ones to convey the decision in all.


No Ring No Bring

Don’t forget the guests of guests when enlisting for who to invite to wedding. An ideal wedding invitation clearly states to bring the plus one if he or she is engaged or in an open romantic living relationship. Only a committed partnership is eligible for a wedding invitation as a plus one. But if you do not know the “other significant” of your guest, you should feel free to give an invite for a single person. As plus ones can also give a hike to your wedding budget. Let your guest decide if he wants to bring his plus one or not.

Who Should Not be Invited?

Creating a guest list become easier if you learn to separate the wheat from the chaff. There are many type of people that must not be invited.

High School Friends Who Are Not Close Friends

There are many old high school friends that you do not get in touch with very often or have lost connect with for many years. So there is no need to give them an invite. Skipping them from your list is ok.


Your EX

Never think about inviting your ex to your wedding until and unless you two are on very trustworthy and friendly terms. And your partner has full confidence in this friendship. Otherwise it could be damaging for your new relation.


Office Head/Boss

Inviting your boss is not a must do thing. Trim your boss’s name down from the list if you share a formal relationship with him.


Ill-mannered Friends or Relatives

Every one wishes to have a picture perfect wedding. Prefer to invite decent and well-mannered guests. If there is any friend or relative famous for creating scenes after drinking or anything like that. Never allow them to ruin your day.


Long Lost Relations

There are many distant relatives like uncle and aunts and remote cousins that you rarely meet or talk to. You should not feel obligated to invite them. It’s better to invite some friend than a remote cousin or aunt.


People Next-door Who Are Not Close

You should leave your neighbors off the list if you do not have a socially strong bonding. Just because you greet each other every morning does not make it necessary to invite them on your wedding.

More Rules to Know Before Sending Out Your Invitations


There are many people who are just acquaintances that you meet on some social event or weekend party organized by some common friends but you do not share any direct bonding with them. You don’t need to invite them on your big day as they are not your friends.


Traveling to some town, where some potential invitee resides, but you do not meet or even call him or her. Then there is no need to invite them or feeling guilty or ashamed of it. As you do not share any noticeable relationship with them.


Avoid inviting any person that you have had sexual relations with. But if you want, your fiancé should have the veto power to take this decision.


If a call or text messages from an acquaintance make you feel pissed off, then you surely should not invite that person to your wedding.


Never commit the mistake of sharing your list of who to invite to wedding on social media. This will annoy those who are not invited.


Cutting off your family invitations should be done thoughtfully. Inviting one uncle whether close or remote, means you would have to invite all others too. Similarly inviting one aunt or cousin means the invitation to all others too. Big family requires a big budget wedding otherwise it may leave the skipped ones with hurt feelings.


Trust Your Instincts

If you still feel some confusion while deciding about some people as your wedding guest, the best thing is to forget everything and follow your instinct. Like Jill Notkin says, “If you're unsure, err on the side of being inclusive. And, if you're no longer friendly with certain people from your past, don't feel obliged to invite them to your wedding just because they invited you to theirs. “If someone still means something to you, you probably still mean something to him or her,"